October 24, 2011 § 16 Comments

A text from Poppy Seed thanking me for my thank you letter.  So he is still thinking about me.  I had thought that was no longer the case.

A polite text back.  I am like that.  Politeness dictates that I couldn’t not.

But of course I am thinking about the pleasure a text from LS would have given me instead.

Naturally, it is not to be.  I am not even hoping.  Though I am hoping he will come to stay with BF.

Just waiting.



§ 16 Responses to Waiting

  • Margaux says:

    Ah, but did YOU ever send a text to LS???

  • Jane says:

    After reading your posts re: LS, I really think you should have sent him a text after your date/meeting then he will have some clue that you could be interested. He may be one of those men who like women to make the first move otherwise he will think you are not interested so he has probably moved on to other interests and possibly another woman by now. It could be that he is waiting to see if he can spend Christmas with someone he is interested in before he makes the commitment of spending Christmas with your friend. Poppy Seed has been positive in responding to your initiative meaning you sent him a thank you letter first so maybe you will receive a positive response from LS if you send a text now. I have learnt from previous experience that whenever I have made the first move in terms of sending the first text to someone I want to see again, then I have never been let down.

  • MissBates says:

    I agree with Jane — what happened to the legit, non-plankton-y pretext you had for contacting him? Did it fizzle? Or not yet come to fruition?

    • The Plankton says:

      Dear Miss Bates, Yes, you are right, the non-plankton pretext did fizzle rather. I have decided to await his next reply to BF – which will probably be weeks yet, while he decides if he can go and stay with him or not – and then take it from there. Or not, as the case may be! Px

  • Erin says:

    I’m not sure it is wise to send LS a text at this point. If he accepts the BF’s invitation and you end up there too and you’ve previously sent a text out of the blue, I think you might as well have a blinking sign saying “set up” on your head. Because you and the BF don’t want it to look like a blatant set up, right? That was the impression I got. I do not, however, see anything wrong with texting him if he declines the BF’s invite.

    • Man Fifty says:

      Bloody hell, girls! Surely the dating game is not really this complicated..? If it was, the human race could be facing potential extinction. Stop pontificating, navel gazing and philosophising and get out there…!

      • MissBates says:

        Out “where,” exactly, ManFifty?

        Let me guess — we “girls” should go on a course? (1st session thereof comprised of one dandruffy man with halitosis and 14 middle-aged women who’ve been advised to go on a course; 2nd session comprised of the dandruffy man and the instructor.)

        Or to a midlife singles event where the male:female ratio is 1:17. (cf the same dandruffy man who attended the course — he does get around — or perhaps it’s YOU — the comments section of a blog aimed at single middle-aged women does seem like the kind of place the dandruffy guy would frequent….)

        OR to a dinner party where the only single available men are your hostess’s gay co-worker and the host’s recently divorced/widowed father who is 30 years too old.

        I suggest to to you that we HAVE “gotten out there” and found it to be dire. Thus, the need (yes, need) for Plankton to take her generous friends up on the offer to invite her to the same event at which an attractive, available, age-appropriate, hetersexual man may be in attendance, and thus her anticipation of/trepidation about the event, and her care not to appear desperate by texting him in advance of said party without a damn good reason.

      • The Plankton says:

        Dear Miss Bates, Thank you. Couldn’t have put it better myself. Px

      • Erin says:

        Welcome to our world, Man Fifty : ) This is what females do. This is why our girlfriends are golden!

      • fi says:

        Miss Bates ,your reply to what was clearly meant as a teasing friendly bit of advice from a bloke (remember them – you’re all trying to hunt one down and capture him) has probably left all the men who read these pages thinking. Thinking perhaps that middle aged planktons are too much hard work and Single For A Reason themselves.

      • Man Fifty says:

        Fi, thanks for your moral support. But, don’t worry, I don’t consider such negative comments to be representative of womenhood in general. Fortunately, the overwhelming majority of single women of around my age that I meet, both at work and socially, are open, engaging, friendly and positive in outlook. I’ve only ever encountered this sense of hostility, negativity and hopelessness in the blogosphere. Now, isn’t that interesting…?

      • Man Fifty says:

        Miss Bates, thank you for taking the time and trouble to reply to my comment. I apologise if I caused any offence; that was not my intent. You’ve clearly had some disappointing dating experiences and, in that regard at least, you have my sympathy and understanding. However, the hypothesis that you appear to have developed: all men that I’ve met are hopeless basket cases; therefore, all men are hopeless basket cases, is false. Not only is it false, but you now appear to approach all your male encounters (including this one) as opportunities to prove that your flawed hypothesis is true. Rather than seeking out (or imagining) minor flaws in the men that you meet, wouldn’t it be so much more rewarding to discover their hidden strengths..?

      • Lydia says:

        Don’t agree with Miss Bates that there are no good men around. I spoke to two this week. They weren’t for me but they were nothing like described on this thread.

        If you go there thinking men are wonderful (I geuinely like men, some are lovely) and want someone there are good men to had.

        What I don’t do is obssess about it all. Life is far too busy. I think people who do need to take on a second job or charity work or have more babies just to keep themselves occupied with things which hvae a point rather than pointless going on and on about he said this and she said this… it gives the rest of us women a bad name.

    • EmGee says:

      This advice seems sound & reasonable to me.

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