Surprise Latest on Long Shot
January 27, 2012 § 54 Comments
Well, seems I have been disingenuous but, I swear, unwittingly so.
Yesterday I said there wasn’t even the faintest twinkle in the ether, and there wasn’t, and I am not saying there is now, but in the evening, of course when I was least expecting it (I wasn’t expecting it at all), rushing around like a blue-arsed fly, I did receive an email from Long Shot. Quite 13 days after I sent him mine.
He is in a place where internet connection is supremely sporadic but is returning to the UK in a week or two. His expression in this latest cyber-despatch, I decided, was more old-fashioned than emotionless. A man who has been away from society for a long time. A man who keeps his own company. He was friendly and said he will ring or email me when he arrives.
I was pleased with myself because I wasn’t particularly excited and yet I allowed the missive to qualify, along with my daily latte and the theatre tonight, as one of my many Reasons to Be Cheerful, but it is by no means the main one.
Also, I am not going to be agonising about whether to send a reply, when to do so, or what to write. I will send one – politeness apart from anything else, and a certain curiosity – but I will do so when it suits me and, as is my nature, I might even make it quite long and hopefully quite funny – or not, as the case may be. Precisely how the mood takes me at the time. There will be no contortions over its composition. I shall be writing it not with a cool, games-y voice, but in a voice which is entirely spontaneous and my own – like this blog, in fact – and he can take it or leave it and, at this stage, I’m not terribly bothered. I intend on being natural me, not some cool me which is completely unnatural, and which is a construct, and gets me nowhere. He’ll either like it or he won’t, but that’s the same with the fake cool persona: he’ll either like it or he wont (I can’t second-guess which). Only if he likes the fraudulent me, and I like him , then I would have a heck of a job trying to maintain the cool for more than an hour or two let alone into any friendship or relationship that might develop. No, best to be entirely myself. No more different-kind-of-woman bollocks.
See what happens. If anything. Might be nice if something did, but there again, might not. He may turn out to be a sweetheart. Or an arsehole. I’ll decide.
Wew, a few months of listening to you lot, have I evolved!