July 2, 2012 § 27 Comments
I met a woman at a party to whom I didn’t take, I must admit. She seemed bitter and cross and lacking in warmth. She moaned about men, the lack thereof, and the impossibility of finding one, anywhere. After two or three decades on her own, she said, she was now “indifferent.” I thought, indifferent is allowed, but Bitter is a less good look and her self-confessed indifference is actually more than that. I can see a time when I might become indifferent, as a defense, and that’s allowed, but properly bitter is unbecoming. Oh, I can do bitter with the best of them, and have done so on this blog a great deal, I am sure, but as an out and out disposition, it is not a great way to be. That woman was off-putting, even to a fellow plankton. I thought, I hope I am not like that and never become so.
The next day I learned a little bit more about her. She was beautiful in her youth and had many admirers but was jilted at the altar and has never had a good relationship since, nor children. I thought, I have been hasty in my judgement. No wonder she is bitter. Every right. There must be few humiliations more horrific in the lexicon of human humiliations than being jilted at the altar. The experience has obviously ruined her life.
But what is so unjust is that bitter is still not a good look.
Note to self: whatever life throws at me, and it has thrown a lot, better to steer clear of Bitter.