Experienced Older Women
October 31, 2012 § 72 Comments
My Times column didn’t come out on Monday, hence silence yesterday. More apologies.
I was talking to a friend yesterday about Young Twinkle and she made me laugh because we were speculating as to what it is a young man might find attractive about the older woman. The great cliche is that it is her experience but, in our wisdom, my friend and I thought “experience” might be a misnomer for desperation and gratitude! I think she has a point. I question my own “experience”. OK, so it has been extensive (in the past, at least, before I got married) but I don’t think experience necessarily translates as expertise. Every day I read in the papers that kids as young as 11 are regularly watching hardcore porn (the latest report says many of them need to do so in order to get to sleep:WTF?). So young men are expecting porn sex and young women are being expected to have the bodies and parts and “skills” of porn stars and prostitutes and are working to perfect their “skills” by watching more porn… So where does that leave the “experienced” older woman who has never watched a porn movie in her life? I lie: I was once taken on a date as a teenager by a respectable and handsome young man to see La Bete (there is meant to be a little triangular hat on the first “e” but my keyboard doesn’t run to the niceties of French accents, or rather, I haven’t a fucking clue where to find them). It was eye-opening to say the least.
I tell my teenager that sex is NOT a porn movie, and nor should it be, and all power to Cindy Gallop who is trying to spread the word that “ordinary” sex between “ordinary” people is where it’s at. Still, I do wonder how can I compete with a girl in her twenties or thirties brought up on a diet of contemporary porn (as opposed to the tin-pot seventies version of same), and experienced not only beyond her years but also beyond any erstwhile notions of “experience”? It is an alarming thought.
Back to the drawing-board, perhaps, to the men at the other end of the spectrum who might regard me as young and charmingly inexperienced.
But then we’re looking at zimmer frames and circa 86 and I am not entirely convinced I can go there, at least not quite yet.